Funny Text messages

2 cannibls are eating a clown. The first cannibl turns to the other and says does this taste funny to U?

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Q: What will a blonde ask you if you tell her she's pregnat? A: "Is it mine?"
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What are 3 words you never wanna hear whilst making love? Honey, I'm home!
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The longest sentence known to man: "I do."
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Tell me, is it going in? YEAH. is it hurting? oh yeah ouch its huring.OH i will put it slowly. still
hurting?.Aah Yeah.then lets try the other SHOE SIR!
   
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Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagement ring, a wedding ring, and suffering
   
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This message was sent exclusively for the handsome and the beautiful. We have obviously sent it to the wrong number.We are truly sorry for the inconvenience
   
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What's the diference between a blonde girl and a mosquito? If you slap a mosquito it stops sucking!!!
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Man pinches wifes breasts and says if we firm these up we can get rid of the bra. Wife grabs his penis & says if we firm this up we can get rid of the milkman.
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Boy asked his mom "is it wrong to have a willy?""No why"she replies."Well dads sweating like fuck trying 2 pull his off"
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how do you confuse a wanker?.........................a.32
   
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T-MOBILE regrets 2 inform u that the network has gone down on everyone except u.We regret 2 inform u that no one would go down on u.not even a network
   
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