CUSTOMER NOTIFICATION
As of May 2001 Viagra will
only be available through
chemists by its chemical
name.So please ask for
MYCOXAFLOPPIN
Thank you

FARMER SAYS 2 HIS WIFE IF U HAD BIGGER TITS WE COULD GET RID OF THE COWS, WIFE REPLIED IF U HAD A BIGGER COCK WE COULD GET RID OF THE TRACTOR DRIVER!

what does a pizza delivery boy & a gynecologist have in common?....
They can both smell it but not eat it.

Q. How do u confuse a wanker
.
.
.
A.32

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's £1.50 per minute

You - cute
You = hot
You = sweet
You = intelligent
You = amazing
You = perfect
Me = liar

Q: What's the definition of irreconcilable differences?
A: When she's melting down her wedding ring to cast it into a bullet.

Two sausages are in a frying pan. First sausage says: "It's hot in here". Second sausage replies: "Eeek, a talking sausage!"

BREAKING NEWS...the government have announced they are to put blue movies at all petrol pumps, so u can watch someone else being shafted at the same time as u!!

Just nicked a joint of beef from tesco's. Security guard ran after me shouting hey u what u doing with that? I shouted Mash, peas, carrots n gravy u nosy tw*t!

What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?
You don't, you've told her twice already!

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks